I want to make a zoo with you.
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Randomize
