Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize
