I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
Randomize
