he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
She's like a pop up book from hell.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
Randomize
