so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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