So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Randomize