why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
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