So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Randomize
