And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
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