think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize
