I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
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