I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
He? As in you personified your dick?
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
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