Sponge bath it is.
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
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