His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
