I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
