I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
I have aggressive nipples.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
Randomize
