brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
Randomize
