I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
Randomize
