OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
why does being broke make me substitute dinner for vodka, Xanax, and two day old cupcakes? I don't like being fat, jittery and drunk.
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
Randomize
