Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize
