are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
A bitchslap is in order.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
