Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
