Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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