first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
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