Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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