She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
I just sucked dick on a ferry
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
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