I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
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