Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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