I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
Buhtt sex?
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
Randomize
