Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
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