they need to just BURY HIM!
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
