So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
Gay?
German.
Pity.
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
Randomize
