oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
Randomize
