I am in a vortex of obligation.
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
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