that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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