I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize
