He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Randomize
