Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Randomize
