I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
