I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
Randomize
