You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
Can I color on your dick again?
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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