All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
Hey just wanted to let you know my nose is broken and I have a fractured wrist. I told you it wasn't a slip and slide.
Dude I didn't think you'd do it. I mean come on, who puts a slip and slide on their driveway?
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
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