You just made me feel so damn special
I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
Actions speak louder than pants.
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
You were trust falling into bushes
Randomize