i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
Welp...herpes.
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
Randomize
