Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
Randomize
