My hair reeks of homosexuality.
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
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