it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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