Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Randomize
