Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
smell my finger.
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
