my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Randomize
