Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
Randomize
